Category Archives: Everyday Life

Topics related to the world we live in

Spanking

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It seems like spanking used to be a pretty common form of punishment. Watch Little House on the Prarie, or some such show, and you’ll see parents and/or teachers using a switch as an instrument of correction. However, in recent times, many people have begun to see spanking as cruel, abusive, and unnecessary. Even some Christians hold this view, which is surprising to me.

Orginally posted 9/29/04 on bibleforums.org:

In my family, spanking was the main form of punishment. Occasionally if my brother or I were fighting or complaining, my mom would make us eat a dried out piece of bread because “Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife” (Prov 17:1). There were a few times we got our mouths washed out with soap, a few times I had to stand in the corner for a while, at least once when my bike was taken away for a while. Most of the time, though, if we disobeyed or did something that we knew was wrong, we got spanked. I don’t think I was ever grounded or sent to my room. My best friend got grounded a lot, and I thought it was unfair because his punishment affected me too since we couldn’t go out and play.

With few exceptions, the implement of spanking was always THE PADDLE. THE PADDLE was half of an old yardstick. Not the flimsy ones we have today, but one that was 1/4″ thick and didn’t have any flex to it. THE PADDLE was hung on a nail in the hallway beside the basement door. Sometimes we would have to “go get THE PADDLE” ourselves and bring it to Mom or Dad so we could get our spanking. Other times we would have to sit and wait while they went to retrieve THE PADDLE; you could always hear it rattle against the wall when they lifted it off the nail. Most spankings took place either in our bedroom or Mom and Dad’s bedroom. They would make sure we realized what we did was wrong and why they were spanking us–you know, the ol’ “this hurts me more than it hurts you” line, then we would have to bend over and put our hands on the bed while they delivered a handful of swift smacks to the rear, the force being pretty consistent but the quantity varying with the level of wrongdoing or how rebellious we were.

I don’t remember how old I was when I got my last spanking, but probably a little older than when most parents stopped spanking their kids. I’m guessing I was in junior high. By that time, I could put up with the sting without crying, so I think it lost its effectiveness and even made me a little resentful of the punishment.

With one possible exception, I never felt that my spankings were abusive or uncalled for. The punishment was never delayed; if Dad wasn’t home, Mom spanked us; she didn’t say “wait until your father gets home.” It wasn’t done on the spur of the moment or for accidents. It wasn’t done in anger. My parents didn’t yell at us or threaten us. But if we disobeyed them, there was a good chance that we would get a spanking.

My parents may not have had the perfect strategy when it came to discipline, but I can truthfully say that I am glad I was spanked. My brother says the same thing, and his kids get spanked too if they disobey. If I have kids someday, they will get spanked too.

Obviously (hopefully) you shouldn’t spank a baby. The child has to be old enough to understand a command and willfully disobey; most toddlers can comprehend this. Some people thing spanking is wrong, but I’m sure they would agree that parents should discipline their children. I’m curious how you discipline a toddler or small child. You can’t reason with them. Telling them “no, don’t do that” isn’t effective; they’ll just keep doing it and you’ll end up either caving or pulling your hair out. Inconveniencing them doesn’t teach correction; they’re not old enough to understand why their parents are depriving them of something they want; but they are old enough to connect a spanking with whatever they just did.

Okay, I’m tired, and I’ve probably written more than anyone wants to read anyway. If you think spanking is wrong, please read Proverbs 13:24, 22:15, 23:13-14, and Hebrews 12:5-11, then explain your position again as to why God wouldn’t want anyone to spank their children. And please don’t confuse proper spanking with improper spanking. A proper spanking is not physical abuse, just like a stern lecture is not verbal abuse.

Allah

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Is it heresy to say the Muslims worship the same God that Christians worship?

Many respectable Christians have different viewpoints on this. To me, it’s more important to discuss the character, actions, and expectations of the Creator and Supreme Being of the Universe than to debate what He should be called. Jews do not believe that Jesus was God’s son; does that mean the Jehovah they serve is not the same God we serve? I don’t think many people would say the Jews believe in a different god; however, they don’t believe the right things about God. Some people believe the same principle applies to Muslims.

Does believing the wrong thing about God mean that you believe in a false god? Many people have taken offense at President Bush and others who have said something to the effect that Muslims worship the same God that we do. I have a problem with such a statement if it implies that Islam is an equally valid route to God, but I’m not so sure that it’s necessary to separate “God” and “Allah.” According to the Wikipedia entry on Allah, “The word Allah is not specific to Islam; Arab Christians and Arab Jews also use it to refer to the monotheist deity. Arabic translations of the Bible also employ it.” “Allah” is simply the Arabic word for “God.” Judaism rejects Jesus as the Messiah and therefore believes the wrong things about God, but we wouldn’t say they worship a false god. I know a couple of missionaries to Muslims who don’t try to get Muslims to stop worshipping Allah. Rather, they try to get Muslims to understand that Jesus IS Allah, and the things they have been taught about Allah all their lives are wrong. When Paul was in Athens, he didn’t tell them to stop worshipping the “unknown god” and worship the “true God” instead; he told them “you know this god you worship…let me tell you what He’s really like.” I wonder if that’s how we ought to approach the God vs. Allah debate.

Here are a couple of interesting links on the subject:
http://www.equip.org/free/DI220.htm
http://www.answering-islam.org/God/same.html

Evolution

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One of the debates between Creationists and Evolutionists is the age of the earth. Those who take the Bible literally believe the earth to be 6,000-10,000 years old, while evolutionists say the earth is billions of years old. My intent here is not to debate whether God literally created the earth in 7 days, but to address the discrepancy between the Biblical timeline and the claims of science.

Orginally posted 8/13/04 at bibleforums.org:

First, let me assume that we all believe in some form of Creation, and God created Adam and Eve as fully developed humans.

If Adam and Eve were created as fully developed humans, then they would have appeared to be 20-30 years old, when in reality they were only 1 day old. I think the same is true of the stars, various rock formations, etc. When God created the stars, they were immediately visible, despite the fact that they are many light years away. So scientists today may look at a star and say, “that star is a billion light years away, so it must have existed for billions of years in order for us to see the light.” Or they may look at a rock formation and say, “it takes billions of years for this sort of thing to form; therefore the earth must be billions of year old.” However, if God created the earth with “built-in” age, I see no problem accepting a young earth despite the fact that it may look older than it really is.

Christian Cussing

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“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths” (Ephesians 4:29)
“Therefore come out from them and be separate” (2 Corinthians 6:17)

It is with a little bit of fear and trepidation that I get up on my soapbox for this one. It is not my intent to be legalistic, judgmental, or condescending. However, I think this is an issue worth pondering. I don’t expect everyone to agree with me on this, but it’s something to think about.

Some of the research done by the Barna Research Group has found that there is often little difference between the lifestyles, activities, and values of those who call themselves Christians versus those who do not. It occurred to me several years ago that one of those areas might be in our language. Many Christians think that one of the ways we distinguish ourselves from our non-Christian friends and co-workers is through our language. We don’t cuss or swear or take God’s name in vain. But is this really true? Granted, we have a different vocabulary, but is our speech really any different? Maybe there is something to be said for cultural acceptance of one word over another, but does using a synonym change our intent? Which is more important, the spelling of the words, or the attitude and heart condition from which the words are spoken? They say “f— this,” we say “screw this,” or we say “freaking” instead of “f—ing.” We say “crap” instead of “s—,” “heck” instead of “hell,” “gosh” instead of “God,” and “dang” or “darn” instead of “damn.” We’ve trained ourselves to use different words, but we express the same sentiments. When something doesn’t go my way, why do I feel the need to express my frustration by using one of my selected “substitute” swear words? Rather than using a “non-swear” word, why not rise above it and not get upset?

On another note, one of my personal pet peeves is the phrase “you suck” or “this sucks.” Before I started hearing people say “you suck,” I used to hear non-Christians say “suck mine,” which is a slightly abbreviated version of a more explicit phrase.  Maybe I’m wrong and the two phrases are not connected, but I have heard innuendos in sitcoms and movies that seem to confirm the obscene meaning behind the phrase. Is this the way people who should be known by their love ought to talk?

Well, I hope I haven’t alienated anyone. If you know me, feel free to call me on the carpet when you hear me use a “substitute” swear word, ’cause I do it too, but I really think it would be better if we didn’t.

Friends

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“A man who has friends must himself be friendly” (Proverbs 18:24)

There are three types of friends: circumstantial friends, chosen friends, and natural friends.

Circumstantial friends are the most common; in fact, almost all friendships start out as circumstantial. A circumstantial friend is your friend because circumstances have placed you together, whether it be a small group at church, a classmate, or a co-worker. Circumstantial friends come and go; when circumstances change, the friendship might fade. For a circumstantial friendship to last, the person must become a chosen friend.

A chosen friend is someone with whom you choose to make an effort to form a friendship. By choosing to focus attention on building a friendship a circumstantial friend can remain a lasting friend even when circumstances change. Sometimes a chosen friend does not start out as a circumstantial friend; perhaps you choose to go out of your way to forge a friendship with someone with whom you would not normally have much interaction.

A natural friendship will usually start out as a circumstantial friendship between two people who discover that they just “click.” You thoroughly enjoy the other’s company right from the start and feel perfectly at ease with each other; this is the person who is most likely to be your best friend. Even though personal interests and convictions might differ, there is a natural affinity between spirits. Natural friendships are the most fun, but the most rare. Even natural friendships will fade if the friendship is not moved into a chosen friendship. Chosen friendships take the most work, but that is what is required for a lasting, meaningful friendship.