I got the following letter in the mail not long ago:

Steve,

Our love began with a glance across a parking lot.
You possessed me in just a few days.
I remember long drives through the countryside,
And long weekend getaways.

But the years passed, and like upholstery in the hot sun,
Your love began to fade.
And now in a time when I need your care the most,
You hit the blinker and turn away.

And while our gas tank of love may be running on fumes,
I still have plenty of love to share.
So if you have a quart of tenderness left for me in your heart,
Take me back to Firestone Complete Auto Care.

Love,

Your 2000 Celica GT

I didn’t know my car felt that way.  It’s been over a month, and I’ve yet to take my car back to Firestone.  Now there’s an awkward silence every time I get in the car.  Someone else who got a similar letter from their car decided to write back.