Christian Cussing

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“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths” (Ephesians 4:29)
“Therefore come out from them and be separate” (2 Corinthians 6:17)

It is with a little bit of fear and trepidation that I get up on my soapbox for this one. It is not my intent to be legalistic, judgmental, or condescending. However, I think this is an issue worth pondering. I don’t expect everyone to agree with me on this, but it’s something to think about.

Some of the research done by the Barna Research Group has found that there is often little difference between the lifestyles, activities, and values of those who call themselves Christians versus those who do not. It occurred to me several years ago that one of those areas might be in our language. Many Christians think that one of the ways we distinguish ourselves from our non-Christian friends and co-workers is through our language. We don’t cuss or swear or take God’s name in vain. But is this really true? Granted, we have a different vocabulary, but is our speech really any different? Maybe there is something to be said for cultural acceptance of one word over another, but does using a synonym change our intent? Which is more important, the spelling of the words, or the attitude and heart condition from which the words are spoken? They say “f— this,” we say “screw this,” or we say “freaking” instead of “f—ing.” We say “crap” instead of “s—,” “heck” instead of “hell,” “gosh” instead of “God,” and “dang” or “darn” instead of “damn.” We’ve trained ourselves to use different words, but we express the same sentiments. When something doesn’t go my way, why do I feel the need to express my frustration by using one of my selected “substitute” swear words? Rather than using a “non-swear” word, why not rise above it and not get upset?

On another note, one of my personal pet peeves is the phrase “you suck” or “this sucks.” Before I started hearing people say “you suck,” I used to hear non-Christians say “suck mine,” which is a slightly abbreviated version of a more explicit phrase.  Maybe I’m wrong and the two phrases are not connected, but I have heard innuendos in sitcoms and movies that seem to confirm the obscene meaning behind the phrase. Is this the way people who should be known by their love ought to talk?

Well, I hope I haven’t alienated anyone. If you know me, feel free to call me on the carpet when you hear me use a “substitute” swear word, ’cause I do it too, but I really think it would be better if we didn’t.

Friends

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“A man who has friends must himself be friendly” (Proverbs 18:24)

There are three types of friends: circumstantial friends, chosen friends, and natural friends.

Circumstantial friends are the most common; in fact, almost all friendships start out as circumstantial. A circumstantial friend is your friend because circumstances have placed you together, whether it be a small group at church, a classmate, or a co-worker. Circumstantial friends come and go; when circumstances change, the friendship might fade. For a circumstantial friendship to last, the person must become a chosen friend.

A chosen friend is someone with whom you choose to make an effort to form a friendship. By choosing to focus attention on building a friendship a circumstantial friend can remain a lasting friend even when circumstances change. Sometimes a chosen friend does not start out as a circumstantial friend; perhaps you choose to go out of your way to forge a friendship with someone with whom you would not normally have much interaction.

A natural friendship will usually start out as a circumstantial friendship between two people who discover that they just “click.” You thoroughly enjoy the other’s company right from the start and feel perfectly at ease with each other; this is the person who is most likely to be your best friend. Even though personal interests and convictions might differ, there is a natural affinity between spirits. Natural friendships are the most fun, but the most rare. Even natural friendships will fade if the friendship is not moved into a chosen friendship. Chosen friendships take the most work, but that is what is required for a lasting, meaningful friendship.

Increase Your Faithing

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“Faith as small as a mustard seed…” (Matthew 17:20)

People sometimes speak of faith as if it came in amounts– “He has so much faith.” I argue that faith does not come in amounts, but rather is something that is exercised. Faith is belief, and belief is not something that comes in amounts; you either believe or you don’t. It is what you do as a result of that belief that constitutes the “greatness” or “littleness” of your faith. Jesus says that faith as small as a mustard seed can move a mountain. How much smaller than a mustard seed can you get? The point is, that a seemingly small act of faith can produce tremendous results. Don’t be concerned with increasing your faith; just increase the number of times you use your faith.

Following Jesus

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“Follow Me.” (Matthew 4:19)

Jesus says, “Follow Me.” What are some reasons for following someone, aside from obedience to a command? Why obey that command? I see several examples of following, with different reasons for each. Watch a mother duck, with all her little ducklings trailing along behind her. They follow her out of need, because without her they would die. In the same sense, our needs will ultimately only be met if we follow Jesus. (While strong motivation, no doubt, is salvation selfish motivation for following Jesus– “fire insurance” as some call it?) Another example: a faithful dog, following his master everywhere he goes. True, the master provides for the dog’s needs, but the dog could very likely survive on its own by following its instincts. The dog want to be with the master, even when the dog isn’t in need of something. I think this exhibits love, the best reason for following Jesus. Jesus does so many things for us; in return, we should tag along like a grateful, devoted dog (or lamb). Another reason why people follow is awe. Look at any superstar, and you will see crowds of people following that person. People follow the Pope in hopes of touching such a great man, to hear what such a powerful man has to say. How much more should we follow the God of the Universe! A follower of Jesus follows for all of these reasons– simply because HE IS GOD, because He meets our needs, and–the one which means the most to Him–we love Him.

Achieving Holiness

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“Be holy, because I am holy” (I Peter 1:16)

I know that my spiritual life needs work, so what should I do? God calls me to be holy; therefore, I must obey God and be holy. And how do I achieve holiness? Holiness requires an absence of sin. My goal is now to eradicate sin from my life. The problem, however, is that I fail to eradicate sin from my life. This is discouraging because no matter what I do or how hard I try, I continue to sin. My discouragement and sense of failure leads to a deterioration of my standards. “Since I can’t keep from sinning, is it really all that bad if I sin a little more?” The selfish desires within me don’t want to give up the sin, but my conscience says I should. So when I’m feeling spiritual, I convince myself that the sin is truly unholy and my conscience is right. After doing this I am committed to doing away with the sin. But when I stumble and commit the sin again, it becomes increasingly harder to keep convincing myself that I must stop sinning. How am I to improve my spiritual life when I can’t seem to make good progress towards becoming holy. When I focus on trying to stop sinning, I only encounter failure. I look again at God’s command: “Be holy, because I am holy.” Ah! God wants me to be like Him. And since God came to earth as a man, I have a good model to follow. The answer then is to fall in love with Jesus. Only then, by following the Holy One, am I truly on the road to holiness.