It seems like spanking used to be a pretty common form of punishment. Watch Little House on the Prarie, or some such show, and you’ll see parents and/or teachers using a switch as an instrument of correction. However, in recent times, many people have begun to see spanking as cruel, abusive, and unnecessary. Even some Christians hold this view, which is surprising to me.
Orginally posted 9/29/04 on bibleforums.org:
In my family, spanking was the main form of punishment. Occasionally if my brother or I were fighting or complaining, my mom would make us eat a dried out piece of bread because “Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting, with strife” (Prov 17:1). There were a few times we got our mouths washed out with soap, a few times I had to stand in the corner for a while, at least once when my bike was taken away for a while. Most of the time, though, if we disobeyed or did something that we knew was wrong, we got spanked. I don’t think I was ever grounded or sent to my room. My best friend got grounded a lot, and I thought it was unfair because his punishment affected me too since we couldn’t go out and play.
With few exceptions, the implement of spanking was always THE PADDLE. THE PADDLE was half of an old yardstick. Not the flimsy ones we have today, but one that was 1/4″ thick and didn’t have any flex to it. THE PADDLE was hung on a nail in the hallway beside the basement door. Sometimes we would have to “go get THE PADDLE” ourselves and bring it to Mom or Dad so we could get our spanking. Other times we would have to sit and wait while they went to retrieve THE PADDLE; you could always hear it rattle against the wall when they lifted it off the nail. Most spankings took place either in our bedroom or Mom and Dad’s bedroom. They would make sure we realized what we did was wrong and why they were spanking us–you know, the ol’ “this hurts me more than it hurts you” line, then we would have to bend over and put our hands on the bed while they delivered a handful of swift smacks to the rear, the force being pretty consistent but the quantity varying with the level of wrongdoing or how rebellious we were.
I don’t remember how old I was when I got my last spanking, but probably a little older than when most parents stopped spanking their kids. I’m guessing I was in junior high. By that time, I could put up with the sting without crying, so I think it lost its effectiveness and even made me a little resentful of the punishment.
With one possible exception, I never felt that my spankings were abusive or uncalled for. The punishment was never delayed; if Dad wasn’t home, Mom spanked us; she didn’t say “wait until your father gets home.” It wasn’t done on the spur of the moment or for accidents. It wasn’t done in anger. My parents didn’t yell at us or threaten us. But if we disobeyed them, there was a good chance that we would get a spanking.
My parents may not have had the perfect strategy when it came to discipline, but I can truthfully say that I am glad I was spanked. My brother says the same thing, and his kids get spanked too if they disobey. If I have kids someday, they will get spanked too.
Obviously (hopefully) you shouldn’t spank a baby. The child has to be old enough to understand a command and willfully disobey; most toddlers can comprehend this. Some people thing spanking is wrong, but I’m sure they would agree that parents should discipline their children. I’m curious how you discipline a toddler or small child. You can’t reason with them. Telling them “no, don’t do that” isn’t effective; they’ll just keep doing it and you’ll end up either caving or pulling your hair out. Inconveniencing them doesn’t teach correction; they’re not old enough to understand why their parents are depriving them of something they want; but they are old enough to connect a spanking with whatever they just did.
Okay, I’m tired, and I’ve probably written more than anyone wants to read anyway. If you think spanking is wrong, please read Proverbs 13:24, 22:15, 23:13-14, and Hebrews 12:5-11, then explain your position again as to why God wouldn’t want anyone to spank their children. And please don’t confuse proper spanking with improper spanking. A proper spanking is not physical abuse, just like a stern lecture is not verbal abuse.